Captain Kirk Gets It Done

Nick Flippers – 11/16/2020 – 11:32pm

When I was wondering about what to blog about, I hit up my stats guy and asked what were any interesting stats about the Vikings v. Bears game that I could talk about. Obviously, if I was a talented sports journalist I would have thought of something myself, but I’m not that kind of guy. I’m lazy as shit. 

Anyways…

Tonight marked Kirk Cousins 10th Monday Night Football game. Until tonight, he was 0-9. Basically, the dude can’t ball when the lights come on to say the least. He is not  good in primetime to say the least. I don’t know why—nobody knows why. It’s just the truth. And despite this truth, tonight Kirk Cousins did the impossible. He did it—he did thee it. No, not have sex, he won a Monday Night Football Game.

Kirk Cousins is now 1-9 for MNF. It’s still not good (lol it’s fucking trash) but the question I want to pose is this: Is Kirk Cousins getting better at playing in primetime? Has Captain Kirk gotten over this hump? No, I don’t think he has. 

I think the only reason Kirk Cousins won tonight (or last night depending on when you’re reading this shit) is because the Bears just suck ass. They’re really not good—I feel bad for Allen Robinson. Mitch was never that good, I mean, he was okay, but I never believed the Nick Foles hype. Like I’ve said before, he’s only good coming off the bench. Since he’s been a started, Nick Foles has been putting up dumpster-fire type numbers. It’s embarrassing and hard to watch—I honestly could barely keep my eyes open during this game. 

The only exciting thing about this entire matchup was seeing if Kirk Cousins could finally win a MNF game and goddamn he did just that. However, to all you Vikings fans out there sliding into DMs because you think today is your lucky day, let me just remind you of one simple fact:

Kirk Cousins still blows when it comes to primetime football.